The Single Adjustment That Worked: The Way I Overcame Post-Work Stress Via an Surprising Find in the Loft

One often feel like a coiled spring after work. My shoulders grow tense, breathing becomes rapid and shallow. Usually, closing my laptop with a thud used to lead to the squeak of a cork pulled from a bottle of red, wine poured quickly into a glass, that first mouthful putting a much-needed full stop on the working day.

Then, a few months ago, I discovered my now-adult son’s old school recorder in the attic. I idly blew into it, instantly reminded of the time it was the bane of my life – his daily practice a violent assault on my eardrums, the piercing shriek still reverberating through my head long after he slept.

Instead of throwing it away, I took it down, together with a beginner’s songbook. Growing up, I was the least musical child ever. I took recorder classes in primary school, but never had the opportunity to learn other instruments.

Searching online for recorder tutorials, I viewed many kid-friendly YouTube clips, and printed out a fingering chart. I searched “easiest recorder tunes”, and was thrilled when I managed to knock out a passable Twinkle Twinkle Little Star. Admittedly, a typical young child could learn it quickly, but as a tone deaf, impatient and stressed 51-year-old, it seemed like a major triumph.

My son questioned my actions (and please could I stop), but I persevered – I liked the way the recorder made me feel. My inability to remember anything meant I had to concentrate on the sheet of paper in front of me, and carefully mimic the finger placements. My breathing slowed down, my attention sharpened, and once I’d mastered that first faltering tune, I was overjoyed. I could play an instrument.

Now, after some months, I can “play” other nursery rhymes and a decent Ode to Joy. Sure, my timing is rubbish, and I must jot down note names, but to me, it’s not about being skilled or a “musician” – it’s purely about the joy it provides and the fact I can’t think of anything else when I am playing.

I learned that few kids play the recorder today, which probably relieves parents, but it made me a little sad and nostalgic for my own school days, as well as my son’s.

I make it a habit to play each night after work before I do anything else, and in those 20 or so minutes, I escape into my own realm. Afterward, I feel refreshed and happy.

My friends think it’s hilarious, but one very wise therapist friend told me that I was reducing stress, and boosting mental skills, like memory and sound processing, which is precious at my age. And in terms of my day-to-day wellbeing, it’s truly an ode to joy.